tony walks into his living room one day to see clint on the couch eating cheetos “how did you even get in my house?!” “don’t worry,” natasha says “i let him in.” “hOW DID YOU GET INTO MY HOUSE?”
clint is like “fuck off i just saved the tri-state area.” “i didn’t hear about anything happening to the tri state area” says tony. “yeah,” clint says "that’s because i do my goddamned job.”
Adulthood doesn’t mean you stop drinking juice pouches and eating fruit snacks. It means buying your own.
and mixing them with vodka
At 3 in the morning while marathoning your favorite show because nobody can tell you to go to bed.
And then regretting your decisions the next morning.
Because you have to work.
and make more money to buy fruit snacks and juice pouches.and vodka
I had a dream that I was flirting with Leonardo DiCaprio and I said “what’s your sign?” and he said “DiCapricorn” and I laughed so hard I woke up
IF U WANNA BE MY LOVER U GOTTA at least text me sometimes damn